Day 22, 23, 24 & 25 : Miscounting leading to depression

Half way there seemed like such a milestone. 12th of May seemed like it was just so near. And it is. Because I cannot count. A one year old is able to count to 42. I am not.

On day 22 I found out that my journey finishes on the 17th. You can only imagine the depression I've had since. It topped itself today when I went to the supermarket (the supermarket really is my enemy) and remembered that I had to spend a Friday night on the couch eating dee-lish pizza and drinking boring water. I want Corona. I want Coke.

Also on day 22, IKEA had a sampling tray of Mjølk Chocklad. I immediately grabbed a knife and slid my wrists.

On a different note: Here is Gro drying in front of the heater tonight:

Day 21: Take my hand, we'll make it I swear!

Wooo-ooow, We're half way there! Wooo-ooow, living on a prayer!

Mr. Jovi and I have never been closer knit. I totally understand how he felt. I wonder if Jovi dreamed the same dreams as I do. I swear to God (which doesn't mean much given that I don't think he exist) that Jay made coffees this morning. I heard the milk steamer working away, I could practically smell the precious latte. Again, it was all in my mind. I wonder when Jovi will write a song about that?


21 days to go. Do you think I can do it? And how should I celebrate this milestone?

Day 17, 18, 19 & 20 (PUH!): Mousse inhaling, water fest and the refusal of a the Bounty.

I've been feeling guilty. I couldn't put my finger on it - but then I remembered - I accidentally INHALED a chocolate mousse! A totally OMG moment. J and I were accidentally served desserts, him jelly and I chocolate mousse. Since Jay has incorporated jelly into his detox a long time ago, he had a spoonful and still thought of himself as a worthy participant in our competition (we all know that I have won this challenge - that boy has even had coffee and bikkys after his tooth incident). I decided just to have a good sniff of mine. And a good one, I had. So good that the beautiful mousse disappeared into my nostrils and down it went. I didn't even get to taste it. This happened on Friday.

It wasn't until Saturday arvo I realised that it all had happened in deep, deep sleep.

So gone was the guilt. And another challenge arose. My friend S's b'day bash. A party I where I would enjoy the company of drunk people whilst sipping on my usual. I put a spin on my water with ice cubes and crazy as I am - ordered sparkling water at the pub. Funnily enough I still felt hungover the next day. Did someone say life's unfair?

And so we have arrived to today's debacle. Supermarket. Toblerone half price. Chocolate chip cookies two for the price of one. They all got their fair share of obsessive staring. Which again lead to myself getting a few looks. How rude of them, my fellow shoppers! They don't know that I cry inside every time I spot a Snickers in their trolley. I ended up putting the smallest little Bounty bar in our basket. I would like to start preparing for the 12th of May you see (my plan is a frozen Bounty for brekky). J saw it just as he was about to pay. Bounty had to stay.

Day 15 & 16: Ikea, I want you!

A trip to Ikea every two months is pretty much mandatory in this house hold. We certainly don't buy furniture every time, we travel a bit over an hour for the chocolate, Daim, Bilar and Kaviar. After a meal with Jay's sister and her husband in "Vietnamese-town" we usually eat a bag of Bilar and a whole block of Mjolk choklad on the way home. You can imagine that the trip home had a "dint" in it this time. Knowing that the most beautiful, sweet, divine brown gold was just sitting in the back seat was a true test. But my man and I are used to these temptations by now. We made it.

I think the true test is coming up this weekend when we're planning on sipping on sparkling water at a birthday party.

Day 13 & 14: I Dream a Dream

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Here's what is on my mind 24/7:

• White wine
• Red Whine
• Mango Beer
• Chocolate Fudge Cake
• Crepes
• Banana Bread (My friend A has promised to make me a whole loaf for the 12th of May. Oh yeah!)
• Lindt Balls
• Sure fotter
• Strawberry Ice Cream
• Cookie Dough
• Hummingbird Cake
  

As you can tell, I've had a hard couple of days. On Sunday Chocolate Cake was one of the specials at the restaurant we had dinner, and on Monday the smell of Banana Bread from the cafe next to work was killing me. Push through, push trough. Almost there. Only 28 to go. I must not resort to violence.

People ask me if I can feel a difference in my body, skin etc. The answer is no and no. I'm still 163,5 cm and still weigh X kg. (Did you really think I would tell you my weight??). My skin is still dull and my energy level is zero. Don't believe all the BS healthy people tell you.

On a totally different note, I took a photo of the storm that's hovering over Melbourne tonight:


Yes, I'm talented. It was the only photo that actually worked from the billion of photos I took.

Day 12: Making a Scene

It's a perception out there that breakfast isn't "cool". Everyone seems to "not be a breakfast person". Not me. Preferably I want to fill up within 30 minutes after stepping out of bed.

Today, Jay and I decided to "challenge the paradigm" and go out for breakfast. No, not go, ride. A push bike ride before breakfast is not for us freaks who love breakfast. When we finally arrived at our destination I was hollow, but quickly fixed it with eggs and salmon.

You would think everything was fine then. It wasn't. Jay (being the devil in disguise) had ordered a coffee. And he didn't drink it in a - according to me - satisfying tempo. Unfortunately someone inside me decided to raise my voice and tell Jay to finish his coffee ASAP. I'm guessing whatever made me raise my voice was not impressed being fed another cup of Earl Grey, and was not in the mood to watch Jay drink his milky coffee dream.

A lady on the neighboring table noticed this and gave me a nasty look. Unfortunately for her, she was eating carrot cake. Unfortunately for me, I hadn't had carrot cake for a long time. I jumped over to her and threw her cake on the ground whilst screaming something in the lines of "If I can't have it you can't have it".

Okay, not entirely true. But you get the picture.
Why didn't the rest of the western world join me in this experiment?

Day 10 & 11: First tears

Yesterday was no biggie. A little bit of a down turn to have to order boring tea with lunch, but I'm used to that by now.

Today? Horrible. I'm talking tantrums! I wanted tiramisu for dinner. I wanted chocolate for dessert. I wanted cake as a night cap. I hate myself for putting me in this horrid situation. Noone functions without sugar.

This experiment is a joke.

Day 9: No chocolate record!

Nine days without choccies.... This must be a personal best.
Ah, to think that when I finish this it would be the longest I have been without....
...chocolate since I was a little child.
...alcohol for about 12 years.
...coffee (lattes) for about eight years.

A round of applause for myself! Pretty damn good effort, I say!

Everyone should try this, it is such an ego boost.
I really love my will power. I didn't think I had any!
I am full of myself. I know. With good reason. You know.

Day 8: Dessert is underrated.

We were discussing desserts last night. The conversation followed me into my dreams and then it has been with me all day. Why must I always talk about food? All I can think about is crepes. Crepes isn't the end of the world as such, it's more its sugar loaded siblings who tag along. Naturally, you would have to put sugar and lemon on one. Ergo, it's on the ban list. Another alternative is ice cream and maple syrup. While I definitely will benefit from all the calcium in the ice cream, I am rather unsure about what this maple have that I really can justify? Nothing. A third alternative is blueberry jam. All the antioxidants must be detox friendly. Too bad there is approx three blueberries in the whole jar.

On the 12th of May, crepes will be the death of me, I assure you.

On a totally different note (yes, sometimes I think about other things than food), Jay's surgeon gave him his business card after his surgery last week. His name and details were written in Comic Sans. TALK ABOUT INAPPROPRIATE FONT! Jeez. If I'd seen it before the surgery, I would've pulled out those teeth myself.

You simply can't trust people who trust Comic Sans.

Day 7: Where's my cake?

I need cake now.

Since I came home from work at 5.30 my jaw hasn't rested. I've been constantly chewing on something. Mostly bread. I just hope that it will taste like cake.

Five more weeks of this... Gaaaah!

Edit: Ice cold bounty bar........ Gimme.

Day 5 & 6: Jelly babies

The last two days I have been making and serving up jelly nonstop. You would think there was a kid's birthday party here! I thought I would be so jealous of Jay's sugar overload diet. But I am not. I just feel sorry for him. Honestly, a diet consisting of six serves of jelly a day doesn't even tempt me!

I almost had a weak moment yesterday, though. I caught myself admiring the muffins in the supermarket. It started to get embarrassing when I had to wipe my drool off the floor so I went home empty handed and made more jelly instead. Then I comforted myself with a cup of tea. I feel like all I do these days is drinking tea. It's my methadone. Perhaps I ought to have a 42 days without tea when I finish this?

Day 3 and 4: Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda...

Yesterday was easy peasy (again) and (again) I started to wonder if I really need this challenge. And just then, when my confidence was sky high, day four was at my doorstep.

Day four has not been a friend. I should have planned this experiment a bit better. Should have considered the fact that Jay removed his wisdom teeth today (all four!!), ergo he is in no shape to eat anything else than soup, ice cream or jelly. Ironically enough, ice cream and jelly has been the food of choice. I have been (slaving in the kitchen) making jelly and serving up vanilla ice cream with maple syrup. My treat? A tiny tub of strawberry yogurt. Should I give up? If you think about it, jelly is practically just coloured water and vanilla ice cream is highly nutritious with its goodness of milk...

Guess which shelf is mine? Kill me now.

Day 2: A walk in the park

Things are still running smoothly. I'm starting to doubt my so called addiction. Was I wrong? I'm guessing two days might be too early to tell, I still recall driving to the busy cinema on Easter Friday (while I was waiting for a take away pizza to finish) just to get my hands on a large popcorn.

I think in the near future, however there will be some bumps in the road. My housemate Ben brought home crumpets and fruit toast from the super market yesterday. So now, while the others are having a nice and sweet breakfast I'm hiding in my room in fear of getting tempted! I will not embark on my third day with a hard start!

Day 1: Piece of cake!

I woke up with a terrible headache this morning. Usually I would fix that with a piece of chocolate and a steamy latte (Oh, I feel so sorry for my coffee machine. 42 days without any love)!
Other than that, it was easy peasy staying away from sugar today (Mind you, my belly was still aching from all the lollies I've had on the weekend)! Right now I'm thinking this challenge ain't no challenge. HA!

Countdown has begun! Only 41 days to go! May 12th here I come!

They say it takes 21 days to break a habbit...

...So then I figure it must take 42 days to break an addiction.

I can't remember when it started, my chocolate addiction, but I can't remember not having it. Of course, when I lived at home I didn't have the same freedom to feed my chocolate craving body to the same extent as I have in the later years. I'm talking chocolate for brekky, lunch and dinner. And in all honesty, it's not only the brown gold my body craves. Having a pre-breakfast consisting of popcorn is not a rare occurrence. A muffin for lunch? I've ticked that box too. Once, I ate almost an entire cake by myself at my friend's birthday party! (Sharing is caring, you say? Sigh!) Damn, I have even been seen eating Anton Berg's (YUM!!) whilst riding an exercise bike. Clearly, a change is in order.

I figured, while I'm at it I might as well do it properly, hey? The rules are as follows; No chocolate, lollies, cakes, junk food, mineral water, processed food (i.e. noodles) and of course, a total coffee and alcohol ban. It won't be easy.

To encourage me to go through with this I decided it would be a terrific plan to write my victories down as I go. I will try my best to update this blog every day, and I would appreciate any encouragement you might have to offer to help me through this sugarless journey.